


TOY STORY

by executrix



Category: The Vampire Diaries
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-02-28
Updated: 2011-02-28
Packaged: 2017-10-16 00:52:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/166690
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/executrix/pseuds/executrix





	TOY STORY

Jeremy wasn’t sure if he should sit down at the bar, but most of his life was not being sure, so he sat down.

“An-o-ther Maker’s Mark for me, and a Co’Cola for my friend,” Alaric carefully told the bartender. Jeremy rolled his eyes. “We do a lot in Mystic Falls, Jeremy,” Alaric said. “But we don’t serve drinks to underaged children. Noooo, we do not.”

“Sure is dead in here tonight,” Jeremy said. “Everybody in here’s alive.”

Alaric motioned to Jeremy to take it to a table, even though nobody with preternatural hearing was around.

“At least AndieStarrActionNews isn’t in here,” Jeremy said.

“It’s not called…”

“I even know that,” Jeremy said. “It’s just, that’s what he always says.”

“Cheers,” Alaric said, raising his glass with the hand with the ring. Jeremy clinked the glass, also held in the hand with the ring.

“Yeah,” Jeremy said. “That should be the official town song. If you like it, you shoulda put a ring on it. Otherwise, you might have to stake it or there might be another weekly episode of When Animals Attack: Mystic Falls edition. Mr. Saltzman, why are you even still here? I can’t **go** anywhere, unless maybe I can get a fake driver’s license and join the Army or something. But you can actually leave.”

“It’s not that simple,” Alaric said. He stirred the melted ice with his index finger. “I came here for a purpose. I didn’t have a plan for afterwards. I thought he’d, well, get rid of me instead of just…getting rid of me.”

“So what does it make us?” Jeremy asked. “Dumb? Crazy? Gay? I mean…I like girls. You used to be married. And…the thing with my aunt.”

“If it wasn’t for…for him, I’d probably still be married,” Alaric said. “Jesus, how weird is that?”

Jeremy looked deeply into his eyes. “He’s not Voldemort. You can say his name.”

“Wanna bet?” Alaric said.

“You’re, you know, **old** ,” Jeremy said. “And a teacher. And you’re pretty smart. And if you’re as fucked up as I am, I don’t know what to do if it none of that makes it any better, and all I have to look forward to even if I don’t get killed is being a forty-seven-year-old loser instead of a fifteen-year-old loser.”

“I’m not forty-seven!” Alaric said, deeply affronted.

“I know. That was just an example. It’s not like I want to do you or anything, although now I look at guys more, y’know? And you’re pretty good-looking. But I guess you’d get into trouble for dating a student.”

“Even here,” Alaric said, with a ghastly smile.

“Here!” Jeremy echoed. “The people in charge here are so dumb, they’ve got to have some kind of hidden agenda. Like, Mrs. Lockwood is really Lex Luthor. Or Caroline’s Mom is Bad Horse or something.”

“But don’t sweat it, Jeremy, your virtue is exceptionally safe around me. And it wouldn’t work as revenge either. Because, whatever you do…he just. Doesn’t. Care.”

“It would get to him if somebody killed my dumb sister,” Jeremy said. Alaric’s eyes widened in shock. “I mean, that’s not a suggestion. Or, or, whatever he says about Katherine, you bet it would get to him if something happened to her. Or, he doesn’t really like witches a whole lot does he?” Jeremy didn’t think that dating someone as pretty and hot and smart as Bonnie would be the worst thing that could happen to him.

“C’mon, buddy,” Alaric said, standing up, crossing the table, and slinging his arm around Jeremy’s shoulder when Jeremy stood up too. “There goes the neighborhood.”

What with sitting down, fussing with Andie’s jacket, fussing with Andie’s scarf, snapping his fingers for the waitress, compelling the drinks to be on the house, and feeding Andie the strawberries and pineapple cubes threaded on the bamboo skewer in her Honolulu Hurricane, Damon didn’t even notice.


End file.
